Excerpts from Famous Speeches #2: Imagining "Ask Not What Your Country Can Do For You" as performed by President Donald Trump

[Original text]
In the long history of the world--and it's been a long history, right? extremely long, this world has been around a long long time--in the long history of the world, only a few generations have been granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I do not shrink from this responsibility — I welcome it. I welcome it. Maximum danger doesn't bother me. I'm not one to shrink. Some people shrink, you know? They see danger and they hide. They shrink. Look at Nordstrom's. A little pressure. They shrink. Shameful, how they treated my daughter, Ivanka. Yeah, she's really something, and what a beauty, that one. If I weren't happily married and, ya know, her father...(Was that bad?) But Nordstrom's, they shrink. The judges. They see a little danger, a little controversy; they shrink. The media. The New York Times. Lie. They lie. They shrink and they lie. I welcome it. You won't find me shrinking. So I welcome it, I do. I won't shrink. That's how I won the election. You all wanted someone who wouldn't shrink. And you got him...

The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this endeavor will light our country and all who serve it —our country and all who serve it, not those who are coming here who want to kill us, not the criminals and the bad hombres carrying drugs that are coming in by the millions over our border...Our country and all who serve it and if you don't want to serve it, we don't want you here.

And so, my fellow Americans: ask not what your country can do for you — ask: what have you got to lose? Really. Think about it. What the hell have you got to lose?

My fellow citizens of the world: ask not what America will do for you. Quit asking for handouts and start paying your own way. Quit taking advantage of us; those days are over. I said it and I will say, those days are over. Bye bye. Ask not what America will do for you. Ain't happening.

Excerpts from Famous Speeches #1: Imagining "I Have Been to the Mountaintop" as performed by President Donald Trump

[Original text]

Well, I don't know what will happen now. Nobody knows. Nobody knows what’s happening. We have got to figure out what’s happening. We have got to stop everything from happening until we figure out what the hell is going on.

We've got some difficult days ahead. Very very difficult. More difficult than you can even imagine. But it doesn't matter with me now. Because I will fix it. That’s what I do; I fix things. Difficulty does not bother me.

Because I've been to the mountaintop. Did ya know that? To the very top of the mountain. Way up there. The lying media won’t report it, but I’ve been there. All the way up there. Very few people—maybe nobody else—has been there, but I’ve been to the mountaintop. That was the reason I got elected. People heard me say I was going up there. People said, you’re not going all the way up there, are you? Nobody goes all the way up. I say, yeah. Heights don’t bother me. 

And I don't mind. I'm not concerned about that now. I just want to do God's will. Right? You all like God, right? The big guy. Very very important book, the Bible. Extremely important. God wrote a bestseller there. Better even than The Art of the Deal. Better, and there’s no other book I would say that about.

And God—right? God—God’s allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I've looked over. Not many people get to do that, or can do that, but there I am, I’m up there and I’m looking over. And I've seen the promised land. There it was. And I can tell you, it is promised. Very very promised land right there.

I may not get there with you. But, seriously folks, it wouldn’t be the same without me, would it? I mean, I’m the one telling you about it. I’m the one making all this happen. I’m the one making sure we get there. That’s why I won the election. That’s why I had millions of people at every rally. So should I be there with you? [To crowd] Whaddya think? [Cheers] Yes, I should be there. But I may not get there with you. We’ll see. You’ll find out when it happens. I know that people want me there. They say, you’ve got to be there.

But I want you to know tonight, that we, as a people, will get to the promised land because of what I’ve done and what I can do. I know how to get things done. And I'm happy, tonight. I'm not worried about anything, because this is what I do. I'm not fearing any man or any so-called judge or any dishonest reporter. Mine eyes—mine eyes it says, that means my eyes, the eyes of Donald J. Trump—mine eyes have seen the glory—right? glory? lotsa glory, extremely glorious, what I see—I’ve seen the glory of the coming of the Lord…